I’m Takin’ It On

7 Oct

This is so fucked up! What did I do wrong? I haven’t done anything else than opened a blog and you… you, you literally abandon me. Like birds you all emigrated out of the valley of Spangbergianism. I thought I was one of you, but there I was sitting slamming the keyboard and when I turned around, you – you guys – – had just taken off in awesome choreographic formations without a single pip or held back little squeak. I trusted you… You could’ve at least tapped me on the shoulder. A tiny gesture with the thumb would have been enough [come-own], but… no… no… you… just left.

I thought we were friends? That we stood behind each other. Bro… Like really, whatever situation, backin’ each other up like like – – like real cowboys, or gangsters. Yeah, as in thug life, you know. Word of honor – – no sorry I didn’t mean that – … repeat… thug life, you know… Like, full of… betrayal and backstabbing – -fine okay – – in dance we don’t push crack, which is probably good – I mean to avoid – – but yeah, like betrayal and backstabbing – – damn, but at least, you know, solidary to the life style. “-I might be a lousy and insignificant thug. But nobody, no-body, can take away the fact that I am a thug. Thugs might play it double and be dirty, but a thug stands up for thug life.”

“-Ugh!” – or whatever native Indians used to say (“-OMG, and now he is a racist also…”), but, wait a minute, how fuckin Ugh are you to your posse? How high on your list is solidarity to the art form and its practitioners? Mine is currently at the lower end of the scale, if it didn’t go throgh the floor already. /–/ I’m fallin’ /–/

Look at this. If there were any sense of community in dance and choreography, in performing arts and mass dance movement how the hell does it happen that I have collected 10.342 views since the 22 August. Yes, that’s right it’s August, not September. Like, how do you think Kenye would react to that? I mean like, he might just set up a really fruitful collaboration with Ann Liv Young. [let’s pee on the beef together] I’m not kidding the dude is unstable?
Now I tell ya, even a gold rank thug from Bed-Stuy would find this wkd. How do you think Jay-Z would explain 10.000 to Beyonce. Fuck you guys, think about my girlfriend for once? What do you think, should I just – – say it – first thing, or is it better to let it rest until she asks, or like wave it away pretending like nothing, or maybe like confess it and hope that she will pity me. Place her hand on my face and whisper something like “-Oh, Spangbergianism… baby… don’t blame yourself…”

OMG, that would be so rotten. “-I’m finished with you, go away? – – I HATE YOU!” Yeah, like what would you do with a girlfriend that like by default acts forgiving and caring. Fuck that, I want a punch in the face, ordered to sleep on the sofa, no on the floor (the kitchen floor, with ice cold tiles). That’s what I’m talking about, that’s a thug life bitch girlfriend – and tell you one thing, she is monogamous and don’t fuck around with interactive or installation, or performativity or bitching about you not keeping up your interdisciplinarity account. Nope, she doesn’t listen to house music.

So here I’m on the kitchen floor/I’m jumpin out window [the last line sang by a sort of R’n’B chorus]/Crushed to pieces [and the back-up girls again] – – Ah Hey Ah Hey Aoaoaoooo Aoaoaoooo — I’m jumpin out window.

Impossible Impossible, what I am to do with my life! Impossible… If at least I was a French choreographer. Whatever! – – 10.342 views and this in 46 days, yes four fuckin six d a y s /—/ that’s like I have to jump out the window over and over and over and over again, repetitive like every Brice Leroux piece throughout history. It’s – – I can’t ever have enough.

I thought we were friends, like really – you know “word-up” friends.

Stop it finally, we’ve had it now! “-Irony is so 90s [roll the eyes], so Sloterdijk – gööööööö.”
In fact I think 10.000 is kind of cool, but this isn’t the self-promotion blog so forget about that one too. In brackets, we love self-promotion – we love Cecilia and Françoise, we deep dig Jan Fabre – wow, we love them fore there genuineness: “-If you don’t buy the piece, it’s your fuckin problem. You just don’t know what you are missing.” – – “-Forget about it, sweet talk or not, if this is what defines dignity to you, get a life. No get two lives.” To diss self-promotion is like “-I heard about it, but didn’t read it [“The Grammar of The Multitude”] …yet.”- -hmm, fascinating – – or to not get the point that opportunism is the new resistance. You know this is the time of tactics, fuck strategic. So, stop thinking you are special and sell you’ ass. Just don’t try to do it with a human face.

We are too few, but no we don’t need friends. No, we don’t want people that need maintenance, that don’t tell you to sleep on the floor, that don’t fuck you over. People that consider judgmental negative, that think open minded is a good thing, that forgot that sifnigicant isn’t another word for meaningful, that write program texts including the word thread, people that one week into their festival talk about being exhausted. I can of course go on as you know, but I’m just so damn happy those douchebags don’t raise the numbers.

We are exclusive and fuck ‘em all. We are too few, but we don’t need friends. We just need to be many. Sign up for a mission without cause, dress for the final battle, but no fuckin’ way join the community.

You know “it’s not for fun, neither for you nor for us”, reality is catching up with, no more fun and games. I’m on a mission – and I have a girlfriend whose lingua doesn’t know mercy – even if I have to do it alone, and you might call me Robert Scott, I’m takin’ it on – I’m telling you: I’m takin’ it on… 100.000 and no sleep. I’m a practitioner of dance and choreography and I’m about to die.

One Response to “I’m Takin’ It On”

  1. Linnéa October 7, 2010 at 20:30 #

    10.342 är ju mycket

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